“What we don’t need in the midst of struggle is shame for being human.”
-Brené Brown
Unfortunately, those of us who have struggled with our weight have oftentimes experienced a lot of shame, sometimes to the point of self-loathing (just me?) because it feels like we should be able to fix a problem so thoroughly within our control and yet we spend years unable to.
This is not your fault.
For a myriad of reasons this is true. First and foremost, the food environment we live in is basically a worst case scenario for those of us who have a propensity toward overeating refined carbohydrates and the genetic predisposition to put on weight because of it.
Refined carbs (sugar, flour, and other refined grains) are everywhere you go. They are at every social occasion, every gas station, every restaurant, every work event, in every situation where someone is providing you food.
The world is constantly offering you refined carbs because they are cheap and everyone loves to eat them. Unfortunately, when we eat them, for many of us, our brains’ react as if we are taking drugs. We overdo it and crave more.
Our bodies are genetically predisposed to say EAT THAT! when we come across calorically dense, sweet, fatty foods. It doesn’t know we have an endless supply. It is preparing us for and protecting us from a famine that will never come.
We eat the food, we store the fat, and the day never comes where we must use the fat for fuel so we store more and more and more.
In order to interrupt this process, we must override our evolutionary instincts which isn’t easy on our best day, and feels impossible on all the other days. Life is stressful. It just is. More for some than others but no one has a stress-free life.
Constantly battling with our biology by not eating the foods that tempt us is another layer of stress that sometimes we just don’t have the energy for. Hence the weight loss roller coaster: we give it a go, run out of steam to keep fighting off the temptations that are everywhere all the time, and all the weight comes back.
Wash. Rinse. Repeat. Famine-ready, once again. (Like, a really LONG famine.)
As you may have surmised, while it isn’t your fault, you are the only one who can do anything about it.
Yes, we are surrounded by food that calls to us and that is the problem. Yes, everyone around you will continue to offer this food to you constantly, even if you ask them not to. Yes, we have stressful lives that makes us want that food even more to give us a moment of reprieve. Yes, it will continue to be this way for the foreseeable future…
This is why weight loss is hard.
Fortunately, as my coach likes to say, you can do hard things. This is not an impossible problem. We can let go of foods that don’t serve us. We do not have to remain victims of our circumstances. We can choose to say, “no, thank you.”
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